I have written a journal of my struggle with alcoholism over a period of several years of my life. My role of house wife, mother, daughter and friend was familiar, yet I was a stranger to myself. This is the journey of how I got from "there" to "here" and the "places in between." It was the places in between that finally brought me to the end of the struggle and to a personal and loving relationship with myself. The incidents and thoughts I have written about are true, in some cases perhaps even mundane. But it was my life, both the good and the impossible. Some incidents were hilariously funny. Some incidents were horribly cruel. Some things were forgivable, some will never be reconciled. Over the years the lessons I have learned are not only imperative to a good life, but have kept me completely sober for many years. I think this book has value as far as seeing how a life can recuperate, become sane and happy. It is not the story of a famous person; it is not the story of how to beat this addiction. It is not in any way a "how to" book. It is a personal look into the life of a "house wife", mother and wife who had fallen into a threatening abyss and the struggle to once again live without fear or pain or "John Barleycorn." This is the story of how I did........